I drew these exercises from the branch of cognitive behavioral therapy, or as is often written, its third wave: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. One of the stages of this approach is acceptance, the essence of which lies in making peace with one’s emotions, thereby eliminating internal conflict and struggle. These exercises are universal and will help cope with various unpleasant experiences—fear, anxiety, shame, etc.
Exercise 1. Greeting the feeling
The person closes their eyes, focuses on their internal state, and greets the emotion they are experiencing: “Hello, anxiety (sadness, guilt). I see that you have come. I am not glad, but I will not drive you away. Stay, if you wish.”
This approach helps a person stop warring with themselves and look at their feelings not as enemies, but as part of a living experience for the first time.
Exercise 2. Breathing with acceptance
On the inhale, the person focuses on a bodily sensation: “I breathe in and feel anxiety (tension, heat).” On the exhale, they say: “I allow this to be.”
Over time, this exercise teaches you not to wall yourself off from difficult experiences, but to be present with them calmly and steadily.
Exercise 3. A place for pain
The person imagines their body as a space. Then they find a place inside for the “unpleasant” feeling and, instead of pushing it away, focus on expanding and breathing into that spot.
Sometimes, simply imagining that pain has its own “legitimate” place brings relief, as if you stop clenching up inside.